Samson Taylor Clark

Sunday night on February 3rd I decided to be irresponsible and watch a documentary that didn't get over until midnight. The documentary was on entrepreneurship and about these people from all over the world who came to the United States to chase the American Dream. I dragged my big body into bed and tried to tell half asleep Chay all about the documentary. He tried with all his effort, bless his heart, to listen to me ramble about entrepreneurs but he is just too sleepy. We both drift off into dreamland. One and a half hours later my eyes pop open due to an all too familiar pain. A contraction.

I was so excited yet so afraid of the long long night/day ahead of me. I get out of bed an hour later after many sleep attempts fail miserably. My contractions were not close together but they were painful enough that I couldn't sleep very well. I go to the bathroom because that is what pregnant ladies do at night. Well come to find out I was bleeding. I call my doctor and I woke him up from a deep deep sleep. He sounded drunk to be honest and he was mumbling horribly but he did manage to tell me to go the hospital and make sure everything was ok. 

It was now 2:30 AM. I call my forever sweet neighbor Cynthia who is a miracle in my life. She answered the phone so chirpy. She has been anticipating this very phone call for a couple weeks now and she was ready. She would be over in 15 minutes to stay with the kids. Cynthia was more ready than I was...I was walking around the house trying to figure out what I am supposed to be doing. Between contractions I try to pack a bag but my mind was gone. I did manage to remember my phone charger and a change of clothes for me and my toothbrush but everything else important that didn't get packed was very much missed 12 hours from then.

By the time I pack sort of and Cynthia is comfortable on the couch, Xander wakes up. His senses just knew something was up. He started to freak out moments before us leaving for the hospital. We then had to wake up Kenzie, who is a natural peacemaker and comforter to Xander. She was excited Mommy was having a baby and so she went into extra mother mode and took over in the "Xander" department. He went into instant ease with her around and Chay and I were able to leave the house knowing Xander would be ok. Our sweet Mckenzie. She is still so young and yet she is already very willingly taking on the oldest sibling responsibilities. Kenzie, Xander, and Cynthia turned on Netflix around 3ish in the morning and Chay and I left to go have a baby boy. 

The hospital is luckily only 5 minutes away. The contractions intensified dramatically in those little 5 minutes. Chay dropped me off at an entrance and he went to go park. Well it was an entrance that is closed and locked after hours but there happened to be a nurse who walked by and saw me, an agonizing pregnant lady in labor, trying to get in the doors. The nurse quickly put me in a wheelchair and up I went to labor and delivery. 

We arrived at the hospital around 3:30 and the contractions were suddenly out of control painful. The hospital makes everything hurt worse. I was tired and weak and I had no desire to take on the birth journey without an epidural. I already did that twice in my life and right then in the painful moments of each contraction, I literally begged for the anesthesiologist, bewildered that I actually wanted to go natural at an earlier time in my life. So weird how things change. I was starting to get mad that the anesthesiologist was busy helping some other girl in labor. I was being irrational. 

By the time my bottom half was numb and I was smiling again because the epidural kicked in, I was pushing 9 centimeters- 30 minutes later, beautiful baby enters the world and just like that...just like that. He is here. 

4:45 Monday morning- the quickest labor of mine by far...

They hand Samson to me all bloody and covered in white stuff. Skin to skin and I am in tears...he is perfect. He is screaming and I am smiling. They eventually take him off of me and weigh him. 9 pounds and 6 ounces. He is 22 inches long. He finally calms down and he starts to make this low humming sound. He hums for the next 8 hours! So funny...so funny I make sure they take him to the nursery after a little while so I could sleep. 

He was so loud. Adorable but loud.

Chay left so Cynthia could return to her family and to take Kenzie to school. She was on a new baby rush- she had been up since 3 in the morning but wanted to go to school and tell the world she had a new baby brother. I spent the day alone and slept when I could and held my new baby as much as possible. 

I kept getting asked from hospital staff what the name of our new son was. I didn't know. Chay was busy with kids at home and so I spent most of my stay alone. I decided to go home early from the hospital. My bed was so uncomfortable. Plus my brother and wife were dropping off my nephew Taylor at the MTC and were spending the night at my house. They were coming from North Idaho. I really wanted to see them and be there. As I was packing up to leave the hospital, Chay and I quickly decided to name our boy Samson. It sounded good. I then gave him the middle name Taylor after my amazing nephew Taylor. He was set apart as a missionary the day Samson was born. Taylor is the oldest child of the oldest sibling (Keith) and Samson is the youngest of the youngest (Me). They are 19 years apart. When Taylor hugged his mother goodbye at the MTC in Provo he said, "I promise to return in honor Mom." And that is why Samson was given the middle name Taylor. Powerhouse! 

Samson is now 4 weeks old. The horrid first few weeks are behind me now and so now I can truly say I am enjoying having a new little baby. Jaundice, cracked nipples, mastitis, healing- almost all behind me. Chay's mom came for a week and her little visit was so needed. She brought food and she cleaned like crazy- she spent time with Julia and took Kenzie to school and picked her up. She made dinner. It was so touching to see her give so much of her time. I know she is one busy lady and to devote a week for me and the family meant a lot to me. That woman never stops I swear. 

We were also served dinner by so many in the ward and family. People kept bringing dinners over...it was so nice and kind. There are so many wonderful people in my life. I am lucky lucky.   

 I am completely smitten by this little baby. I am enjoying him so much more than I normally remember when having a newborn. His little noises and soft warm smelly skin. The cute facial expressions and the quick movements of hands and feet. Oh so precious and perfect. I am a lot more calm now than I was with my first couple. Little cries don't bother me and I know how to soothe and comfort better than I did. I can tell the difference between gas, hunger, and tired. I love to snuggle with him in bed and fall asleep together. It's a wonderful time to slow down and hold a baby for the bigger portion of the day and to just soak it all in. Nothing is getting accomplished around the house much and I am so so tired of course...but it's all just a wonderful thing. Eventually I will have to start getting on some sort of routine...you know, like get dressed and out of my pajamas...but until then I will just focus on this right now in my life. 

It is so sweet to see Chay with baby Samson. The other night I was laying in bed asleep with Samson but Samson was wide awake. Chay comes in and notices the situation. He picks up Samson and takes him into the other room waking me up just enough to tell me he's going to hang out with the baby- keep him company since he's wide awake. 

Xander is crazy right now. He doesn't show any anger towards the baby and is in fact really sweet towards Samson- but he's just out of control and super emotional when it comes to anything else. He is difficult but I swear, he's such a great kid besides his tantrums and stubbornness...he is somehow solid- half of his frustrations are with himself because he can't talk and he wants to communicate so badly. We hardly understand him and it must be so hard for him. I actually remember feeling this way my first couple months in Brasil.    

 So bittersweet this time in my life...love the new addition to the family yet I feel super anxious with life's new changes. But all that can be in another post...I want to be positive for the moment. I seriously feel so blessed right now.