Friday, April 24, 2009

don't be so emotional

a quote I heard this week- not by a journalist, politician, not the words of Thomas Jefferson either (although this sounds exactly like something he would say)- The quote was given by this lady in Boise who teaches parenting classes. I am listening to her lectures on my Ipod in the morning...

"Teach your children to act on principle and not to react on emotion." ~Carleen Tanner
Isn't that good?

Why did I think about our country when I heard this quote? This neat cozy meaningful common sense quote doesn't just apply to parenting. Do you think the majority of decisions being made in congress lately are based on principle? or emotion?

bailouts are emotion, gun control is emotion, pro-choice is emotion, welfare is emotion, paying home mortgages with tax payer's money is emotion, cheating on taxes is emotion, progressivism is emotion- I mean don't you just want to cry and feel sorry for all these people??? ...Well I sort of do- but I'm not government, I'm a friend. Government will never be a friend. From God, from friend to friend, from church, from community, from private sector to private sector we can help each other out, because that is who we are- don't deny what we can do as an individual- to be charitable, loving, kind, employ-

immorality is based on emotion and morality is based on principle...

I react on emotion a lot. It is like I will forget everything important to me and just want to change my world upside down due to my crazy out of whack feelings I am feeling at the moment.
reacting to emotion can be fatal to relationships, the family budget, the waistline, trust, change, faith

reacting to emotion examples:

yelling at children because you're tired,
impulsive spending "Those pillows would look so good in my living room",
Forcing your idea on everyone around you
Stop going to church because someone offended you
saying yes to everything- in hopes to get approval
enabling others instead of teaching others,
"I had a hard day, I deserve to eat this",
"I can always pay it back later",
Doing favors to only those who will praise and support you
finish blog post before changing your child's poopy diapers. oops.

acting on principle: answers to the "reacting to emotions" statement above: oh and this isn't me answering these examples- oh no no no- I only wish I could be so rooted in principles like this...I'm trying.

"I'm tired, don't take it out on the kids"
"These pillows are not in my budget. I will survive without them for now. But they are awesome pillows."
"Everyone has the choice to make their own decisions. No matter how strongly I believe in something, it is still wrong to force and control one's belief's."
"God is perfect, people aren't."
"I can't go to the reception tonight, I really need to go home and watch The Office with Chay"
"Mama ain't making your bed for you no more- who's gonna make it when you're 40?"
"Cookies only make me feel good for a minute, and then the guilt sets in... it's not worth eating just to numb out temporary feelings...but they do look dang good."
"Debt is not good. Prophet said so. Makes sense to me. Everything bought with credit, isn't really mine right?"
"I will serve my fellow men so that I might serve God. Period"
"There is more to life than blogging...(and facebook)."

What is principle? Truth. Deeper meaning. Can't be altered. Is not influenced by cultural trends or evolving ideas.

So when George Bush implemented "No child left behind" he was reacting to emotion "oh my gosh our education system is in trouble, I think I will just take power away from the states and do my own thing and spend lots of money on education" If he had acted on principle he would have said, "Education was not intended to be under the federal jurisdiction, but that of the states. The more local the government that oversees education, the more education will improve. Give the power back to the states."

Bush also bailed out the banks...which was emotional thinking "oh my gosh, the country will collapse! We can't go through a depression again. I have to be in control to save bad business. We can't let bad business fail. We can't let people get kicked out of their homes when they can't afford it anymore, I will just butcher the free markets to save the free markets" Principle thinking: "We need to be strong as a nation, hold our breath, and let these companies fall. Capitalism, like anything else, has its bad moments, but it will re-sprout, we will survive, businesses will learn, we will not interfere- for it is not our place to do so. We are a free country. As a government we will allow the system to play itself out." Can you imagine such a president? Sounds like Reagan. We would definitely see some hard times, but it wouldn't be prolonged like it will be now. you can only imagine what I have to say about Obama...who claims everything is Bush's fault, which it may be, but why is he doing everything Bush did only steroid style...and yet he supports abortion, embryonic stem cell research,... I won't even go there- I'm too tired.



Marne said...

I'm glad you like the cd's. She
has so mujch great information. She told us in class it took her 7years to get those principles going with her so they were automatic in her parenting.

I react on emotion a lot, especially lately since I am an emotional wreck. I cry several times a day and get upset over the littlest things. Yesterday I drove over to Braden's school mid-morning, pulled him out of PE class and apologized to him because I was rude and snippy in the morning. I felt really bad. The poor kid. Just because I feel uncomfortable, tired and whatever else doesn't mean I should take it out on them, right?

Great post April!

Keith Ramsey said...

This quote is great. It reminds me of a class I took at the Y years ago from Steven R Covey. He would often make the comment that we need to be a product of our decissions and not our circumstances. Both comments support the same thought, thanks.

Tiffani said...

I love April how you learned that principle from Sister Tanner and then you showed us how to apply it. I need to get those CDs out again and listen to them. I am VERY guilty of reacting on emotion rather than principle. Thank you for the reminder - how powerful!

I just wanted to let everyone know that Sister Carleen Tanner will be a presenter at Education Week in Rexburg, ID this summer. Check it out at BYU-Idaho's website, I'm sure they have all the information there. I just love her. I ran into her a couple weeks ago and thanked her again for all that I learned from her.