Friday, June 04, 2010


I've been thinking a lot about "light" lately.

I know, a little random.

but the word "light" and what it offers in all its dimensions and interpretations really intrigues me. Spiritually, literally, figuratively, scientifically...

driving on the way here..."here" is my in-law's house- they are gone for the weekend and so in desperation to escape from who knows what- just escape to a place where I can think and act in complete silence...I asked if I could stay at their house. Surprisingly my wonderful mother in law agreed that it was a great idea for me to come and get away for a few days. So here I am. Very weird, I know- but I will tell you one thing- it is VERY quiet here. Just me. Just me. Wow. Just me. I only have to take care of me for the next couple days. This is a first in a very long time...and probably the last in a very long time. Wish Chay were here...but I think this time alone might do some good.

anyway on the drive here my mind was full of thoughts...and I contemplated my life...and my priorities...and this weird trip I was taking to my in-laws house to be alone. And my thoughts led to a prayer and then to more thinking...and then "light" came to mind.

I like light. In fact I am worried about being in this big house in a couple hours. Alone, dark house, dark night...oh dear April- just don't read into any noises you hear.


"Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life." John 8:1

Christ is the light of the world. All things testify of him. Without him we would only have darkness. Christ is truth and truth is light. The magnitude of Christ's light/love is incomprehensible...but we can catch glimpses of it every day and testify of its realness...and continue to learn and grow because of it. There is a lot of light out there...Christ is everywhere if we train our eyes to see Him manifested in all things.

So the whole "light" thing all started when I popped in a health CD I have been wanting to listen to for like a year but never got around to it. I noticed the CD in a pile of stuff right before I was leaving and I had a tiny feeling that maybe I was supposed to listen to it on my drive here. It was interesting to say the least. The bio-chemist microbiologist guy who was talking explained in depth how certain foods we eat produce "light" or energy in the body and how other foods can actually destroy or rob "light" or energy in the body. He went on to say that our bodies do not run on calories, fat, or protein but actually run on light and electricity. He even said that our words, thoughts, and deeds can affect the light in our body. Wow I really liked what I was hearing. He obviously explained it in bigger scientific explanations that went over my head, but I got the jest of it. He then went on to talk about alkalinity acidity pH stuff...blah blah blah...but it made sense nonetheless and I couldn't really disagree with him because he basically pushed the simple knowledge that vegetables are full of proton energy producing minerals and nutrients that can supply healing essential alkaline electricity to the body.

So eat a cucumber already.

(Wow. I'm having color problems with the print)

Then I put in another CD (this time it was music) and one of the first songs I heard was this one:

Hold on the Light Will Come by Michael McLean

The message of this moment is so clear
And as certain as the rising of the sun
If your world is filled with darkness, doubt and fear
Just hold on, hold on, the light will come

Everyone who's ever tried and failed
Stands much taller when the victory's won
And those who've been in darkness for a while
Kneel much longer when the light has come.

It's a message every one of us must learn
That the answers never come without a fight
And when it seems you've struggled far too long
Just hold on, hold on, there will be light

Hold on. Hold on. the light will come.
If you feel trapped inside a never-ending night
If you've forgotten how it feels to feel the light
If you're half-crazy thinking you're the only one
who's afraid the light will never really come -
Just hold on. Hold on. The light will come!

The message of this moment is so clear
And as certain as the rising of the sun
If your world is filled with darkness, doubt and fear
Just hold on, hold on, the light will come.

This song kind of spoke to the heart as it seemed to relate to some of my feelings I've had lately. It made me teary eyed and I felt it was one of those "tender mercies" Heavenly Father gives so freely to his children. It was hopeful. My mom used to love this would give her hope during those long cancer journey days. Joette would play and sing it for her on the piano.

Most of my drive to my in-law's was dark, rainy, and dreary but the last 20 minutes or so the sun broke through the clouds in streams of light. The bright sun hit my face and I felt for a moment the sunshine was just for me...Heavenly Father's way of letting me know he cares and loves me. It was beautiful.

Thank you.

I love this scripture "That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day." D&C 50:24


Tiffani said...

They sang that song at a play that I attended today called "The Ark" written by Micheal McLean. Beautiful.

It was fun visiting with you. Do you survive today? I woke up with a massive headache. I can't stay up late like that again - but it was good chatting with you!

Bev said...

Glad you enjoyed your get away - what a great idea. I love you April. You are strong and so insightful and a wonderful example to me in so many ways. Each of us is very blessed to have you in our family. Love you, Bev