Friday, September 10, 2010


Each day the girls and I have a "calendar" moment. Quickly we determine what day of the week it is, the date, month, season, and current weather. Today we went outside to see what the weather was like and it was sun shining, beautiful and chilly. The driveway was still damp from the early early morning thunderstorm.

The girls started to talk about how scared they were when they heard the thunder and when they saw the lightening flash in their room. And then suddenly I got a flashback from childhood- I remember being a little apprehensive about thunderstorms too when I was little, but my mom loved to hear the rain and watch the lightening from our big bay windows in the house I grew up in. We would snuggle up to Mom and watch the lightening and she would always always always sing, "Rhythm of the Rain" by the Cascades. I was never afraid once she started to sing.

I told the girls that story and Kenzie wanted to hear the song. I started to sing the song and tears welled up in my eyes. I was instantly so grateful for those special moments with my mom.

Last night I attended a funeral. Despite the sad circumstances, it was a beautiful funeral. The young man that died was glorified by all his friends and family. Amazing memories were shared and there were countless stories about how remarkable of a person this young man was. Everyone left that funeral wanting to be a better person.

I love how funerals spotlight a person's wonderful qualities. Although we are flawed by nature and we tend to make silly mistakes, we are still God's children and we all have the light of Christ in us.

It's hard to say but it was easy for me to see my mom's flaws when she was living but now that she is gone, it's hard for me to even remember her flaws and so easy to remember everything wonderful about her. I think death of a loved one helps us see a person as God sees the person.

Side thought that came to me on my drive home last night: Have you ever wondered what people will say about you when you die? What will you be remembered for?


Me~Kelly said...

i am with your mom, i love hearing the rain and watching the lightning.

i am thinking it would be hard to remember her flaws because they were so few and definitely overshadowed by all her good.

when i die my legacy will be very different depending on who you ask ;)

Mothership said...

What a sweet post, April. I think it's time more than death, that solidifies our memory of a person. We start to see with the perfect 20/20 vision the reigning character. Your mother is a woman of great character and that is the theme that dominates her memory--not whether she burned dinner or "collected" cottage cheese containers. (For those of you who didn't know Eddie Kaye, I don't think she committed either of those foibles!) Thank you for sharing a bit of her huge legacy.

Cami said...

I decided a long time ago that when I die, I want to be remembered as having integrity and compassion. No, I don't make my choices based on what people will think of me after I die (or even what they'll think of me now), but those are the qualities I most aspire to have.

Nice post. I enjoyed it - and I was awake enjoying the thunderstorm early this morning, too.

Tracie said...

I had a mom moment yesterday. I was cleaning out boxes that have been left unpacked since we moved 3 years ago. I found a card sent to Carter from my mom on his 1st birthday. I love her handwriting and just seeing it brought the tears to my eyes.

I have decided that I LOVE funerals. the first one I went to after my mom's was so hard because I remembered being that person on the front row and all the feelings came back. But since then I have had the opportunity to attend a few more and I always leave wanting to be a better person.

I also have decided I could care less what is done at my funeral. A funeral is for the living so I would want my loved ones to do whatever would help them heal and not worry about what I would want, after all, I will be in a much better place. But I do hope that my funeral makes others leave wanting to be a batter person.

Love your posts April! Thanks for sharing your journey.

Tiffani said...

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Last year or so Grandpa Ramsey and Aunt Anne passed away within weeks of each other. Attending two funerals almost back to back was wonderful and overwhelming at the same time. I was worried what stories would be shared and what lasting memories people would have of me. It really made me think.

I want to be remembered for standing up for truth and righteousness and for showing love by serving those around me. I want people to feel of my love and concern for them individually. And I want my children to know of my love for the Savior and feel of my testimony.